Explanations
by rEpose
Summary: There was no way he could have brought himself to do the wrong thing, but he had no idea that doing what was supposedly the 'right' thing could hurt so much. PipitxLink, Cawlin's Letter centric.


**A/N: **Well hey, look at that, I'm not dead! Just a warning, this story contains spoilers for the Cawlin's Letter sidequest. The first half of the story contains dialogue and events taken straight from the game, and the second half is my own writing. I hope you enjoy!

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><p>The soft click his boots made on the floor of the knight academy was the only noise in the otherwise silent building. His breaths became heavier as he made his way up the stone stairwell and down the cold hallway, moving as fast as he could without getting into trouble.<p>

He didn't even know why he was doing this. He knew this could only end badly for him. But someone had asked him for help, and he wasn't the kind of person to turn a favor down. Besides, he knew that all in all, doing this job would make his friends happy. And he would rather have his friends' happiness secure rather than his own.

Finally, after too long, he saw the bright yellow of Pipit's knight uniform at the end of the hallway. He smiled when the brown haired knight turned to look at him.

"What's up, Link?" After he saw Pipit put the knuckles of his fists on his hips and his deep blue eyes flash in the soft light streaming through the window, just the way Link loved, he almost changed his mind about putting his friends' happiness over his own. But his heart lost at the last second, and he told Pipit about the love letter Karane had received, just like she wanted him to. Pipits arms dropped in surprise. "...Huh? Karane got a love letter? I-I see... That's interesting... Wow... Erm... Wh-what do you think she intends to do...?" Link watched as the knight known for his confidence and calm nature turned into a stuttering mess.

"Beats me," he said, quietly and at least somewhat honestly.

"So you don't know? Well... That's going to bother me until I find out..." Link was grateful Pipit mistook his pained expression for a confused one. "...Oh! I mean, uhh... It's not like there's anything going on between me and Karane, you know? We're just friends... So it's not my business who she goes out with. I don't have much to say about it."

Pipit's attempt to cover up his long-term crush on Karane just made Link feel even worse. Link saw how he looked at her, the way smiled around her, the way he acted around her. When he was around Karane, every little thing he did screamed that he loved her, and Link could see it plain as day.

"But you know..." Pipit continued, "I do have a duty do make sure that everyone is living up to the high ideals of our knight school, right? I mean, ideal love is unfettered and passionate. Anything less than that can't really be called love at all, you know what I mean?" Pipit got gradually more and more frenzied, his pace picking up and his tone raising. "So I should just step in and make sure that she's found a true love that aspires to the to the highest ideals of our fine educational institution, right? And what about me?" By this point, Link was worried that the students on the first floor would be able to hear him, but Pipit continued on. "I have the right to experience an unfettered and passionate love too, don't I?" The freckled boy leaned in with his arms crossed and his eyebrows lowered, just like he always did when he became the most engrossed in a conversation. "You understand, don't you, Link? I'm not wrong about this, am I?"

Link didn't know what to say. Pipit's proximity and his fluctuating tones and emotions were throwing him for a loop. The now almost nonexistent distance between them was especially disorienting. He was so close that Link could smell the gentle scent of rain and leaves on his tunic and feel the heat from his body. It was starting to make him flush. And of course he understood Pipit's situation. It wasn't as if he didn't understand the feeling of being unsure of whether or not someone held the same feelings for you as you did for them. He understood that better than Pipit might have known.

Link swallowed hard and tried to ignore how close Pipit's face was to his and managed to half-whisper, "You like her?"

To Link's relief (and also to his dismay), Pipit leaned back again in surprise. "Wha-What? Don't be ridiculous, Link! I don't even understand how you can make such a wild accusation! Well, either way..." His eyes drifted away from Link, and just for a moment, Pipit sounded like he was only halfway talking to him. But it was only a moment, and just like that, he was back. "I don't suppose you'd mind asking her what her decision is going to be, would you?"

Pipit didn't say anything after that. Link, of course, again, as usual, followed his mind over his heart and went to find Karane in the library. He found her when he walked in, but she wasn't alone. Cawlin was standing with her, his back to Link.

"You're the one who sent the letter, right?"

"Y-yes..."

Karane giggled happily, smiling at him. "It was a wonderful love letter. Thank you!"  
>"It wasn't... that... great... And, um... Wh-what's your... answer?"<p>

"My answer? Ah... my answer..." Karane trailed off, clearly in deep thought. It seemed to Link she was seriously considering dating him, and inwardly, he was urging her to say yes.

Cawlin was slightly more assertive than Link. "Oh, please! Please go out... with me!"

Just as Karane went to open her mouth, someone called out from behind Link. "Wait!" The three of them turned to look at Pipit, who had clearly ran to get there before Karane could make her decision. "I think you should go out with me instead! I mean... er... I want to ask you out!" Link's heart sank, knowing it was all over.

"What...? Hey, hold on there! What are you trying to pull all of a sudden?"

Karane spoke up and said, "Errr... I want to go out with... Pipit..."

"Ha, see that, you fool? I knew she would choose me! She's been checking me out for weeks!" Cawlin's smug expression dropped almost as fast as it had gone up. "Uhh, wait a second... Wait... Really?"  
>Pipit walked past Link to stand by Cawlin. Link's heart sunk further when he saw a glimpse of the beaming smile on his face. ""Truly? You choose me?"<p>

"Yes! I'm so happy. Thank you..."

"This can't be happening..." Cawlin turned and ran past Link and out of the library, crying out loudly in anguish. However, it didn't even register with Link. He had tuned out long ago, unable to properly confirm what he was hearing and seeing. He couldn't even think straight.

"Link!" Thankfully, he had enough consciousness to look up when Pipit called out to him. "When you told me about the letter, it was at that moment I finally realized. I realized that... I love her. I thought to myself, 'I can't let anyone else take her from me!'" The words hummed as they went into Link's ears. The crushing sensation he felt on his temples, the tightness in his chest, and the muffling buzzing in his ears made it feel almost as if he was underwater. "If you hadn't told me, I might never have even noticed my own feelings for her. I'm so grateful. I don't know how I can ever thank you!"

Link inwardly hit himself. There was no way he could have brought himself to do the wrong thing, but he had no idea that doing what was supposedly the 'right' thing could hurt so much.

The golden-haired boy shook his head, trying his best to look happy for the new couple, saying wordlessly that he didn't need to thank him. That tiny motion was all he could manage. He turned and stumbled out of the library and into his room across the hall. He stood there, leaning against the door and staring at the wall, trying to get a grip on what had just happened.

It all just seemed so impossible to him. He couldn't see how he could lose against Karane. He spent practically every waking moment with Pipit- that is, when he wasn't with Zelda. Partially because Pipit was Link's mentor, of sorts. He was a couple years older and a couple years wiser, and Pipit did his best to teach Link everything he could.

Pipit taught him everything from the kindness needed to treat and protect the people of Skyloft to the way to use a sword honorably and a shield wisely. They sat together at the very top of the Light Tower, their feet dangling over the edge, talking quietly and sparingly. They raced down the dirt paths of the residential area together (but it was hardly ever a race, because Pipit almost always won by just a hair). They sparred together, their burning skin brushing together as their training swords clashed.

Those were the moments Link liked best, where he could focus entirely on the grace of Pipit's movements, the smooth feeling of his tan skin, the piercing look in his dark eyes. He didn't have to think about anything else. He had always admired Pipit (yes, admired, that was the word), ever since he was little. He was a role model of sorts to Link. When he was told Pipit was to be his mentor, he was overjoyed. His dream of getting closer to the older boy had come true.

But with this new development, all those years of work to get to know him had been in vain. Pipit had decided he loved Karane, not Link. And just like that, it was all over.

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><p>Eventually, Link found the will to make his way over to his bed, placing his sword and shield on the floor and laying down. He tried to sleep to get the disheartening thoughts out of his head, but it just wouldn't come. For someone like Link, who could find sleep more lovable than life itself, this was torture.<p>

Several long, painful hours passed. Eventually it was dark, and the golden haired boy still hadn't slept a wink. He was fairly positive he had memorized the pattern of the tiny cracks and uneven bumps in his ceiling, and was growing fairly bored with listening to the floor softly creaking and the quiet pants that came with Fledge's workouts next door. Finally fed up, the blond boy sat up, slung his sword and shield on his back, and headed upstairs to the unlocked doors to leave the academy.

The night was refreshingly cool. An orange glow spilled from the windows of the houses along the twisting roads in the residential area, the silvery outlines of the stone walls and thatched roofs contrasting against the otherwise black night. It seemed everyone in the sky had gone to their beds, like if he moved an inch, made the tiniest sound, he would wake every single person in Skyloft. Well, every person but one.

Listening closer, Link heard quiet footsteps on the ground below him, shuffling forward slowly. He went to look off the side of the large balcony he stood on, and saw the telltale yellow hat below him. As if sensing Link's eyes on him, the brunette boy looked up, straight at the bewildered hero.

"Link!" Pipit called out, far too loud for the otherwise noiseless town. "Good evening! It's great to see you again. Come on down here!" Link was still a little shell shocked from the events of the afternoon, and in all truth, was hoping Pipit wouldn't be out that night. Reluctantly, he made his way down off the balcony and onto the road with the blue eyed knight.

Pipit laughed when the boy in green reached his side. "Funny thing, I was just thinking about you! I didn't think you'd be up so late though. Don't you have some sleep to attend to?"

Link merely shrugged halfheartedly in response, and Pipit hummed, continuing to walk. Link walked with him, staying close at his side.

"Yeah, I'm not too tired either. Usually I want to sleep right through my patrol, but tonight's different. I'm far too excited to be sleepy. I don't think I could sleep a wink if I tried." Pipit went silent, and Link's stomach dropped a little, knowing exactly what he was thinking and exactly what he would say next.

"Link, I really can't thank you enough for helping Karane and me. I am so in debt to you, and I fully intend to repay that debt."

Link's bangs softly brushed his forehead as he shook his head, assuring Pipit he owed nothing.

"No, I truly do! Without your help, none of that would have happened today. I may not have realized my love until much later, and there's no way I would have asked Karane out. For that, I owe you everything I can give you."

He continued quietly, "Love is something meant to be enjoyed between two people. It's supposed to be a happy, passionate thing. One-sided love brings nothing but pain for both, and can't truly be called 'love' at all. Because of you..." Pipit's quiet speech trailed off, and the silence of the night seemed much heavier and enveloping than before. When he started up again, the brunette seemed much louder than before. "Because of you, I'm happy. And I owe you for that." Link said nothing, and it took even him a moment to realize that he was avoiding Pipit's gaze. He forced himself to look up, and instantly regretted it.

They stood underneath the bridge from the second floor of the academy to the bazaar. Light was scarce, the only source being the soft ambiance from the sparring hall that just barely reached the two of them. It curled around the rock wall of the tunnel. and managed to make every highlight and every strand in Pipit's hair shine, and made his blue eyes practically _glow_. He was looking straight at Link, and Link felt almost like Pipit was staring right through him instead of at him. Pipit looked ethereal, and no matter how much he wanted, Link couldn't look away. His stomach was already twisting uncomfortably, and only knotted itself further when Pipit said, his face straight and honest, "Link... Truly. Thank you."

When Pipit began to move closer to Link, it became apparent to him how close his back was to the wall. Pipit's hand landed softly, but insistently, on his shoulder, pressing him gently against the smooth rocks. His other hand found its way beside the hero, effectively trapping him in his arms. Link's eyes closed on instinct when the distance between the two of them closed. The blond was so surprised, he hardly even processed the pair of lips pushing against his until they moved in just the slightest, traveling across Link's, pulling back an inconsiderable amount before closing in again shortly. Their chests brushed together, Link's feeling tight underneath all the pressure, both physical and mental. The yellow-clad knight pulled away, the kiss far too short, and at the same time far too long for Link. He was surprised when the freckled boy looked away. He sighed, "I'm... sorry."

When Pipit began to walk off, Link was surprised again when his arm practically shot out, grabbing onto Pipit's wrist, restraining him from moving away any more. The brunette hesitated before turning to look back at Link. He saw the look of confusion in Link's blue-gray eyes, the wordless demand for an explanation. Pipit sighed again, turning to fully face him. Link released his arm.

"Link, I... I shouldn't have done that. Please forgive me."

He shook his head again, but continued to look at him with that same confused expression.

"I- you see-"

He stopped for a moment and breathed, trying to recollect the calm person he was. "Link, the one I've loved for all this time is _you_. Not Karane. But you know as well as I do; that can't be. I'm sorry I kissed you. I really shouldn't have done that, but... I don't know, I just couldn't control what came over me." He looked away again, his gaze falling to the path beneath their feet. "Please understand me when I say that I can't be with you. You know as well as I do that we can't be together, Link."

Link opened his mouth to speak, his hands reaching out to grab Pipit's, but the other knight shied away.

"Don't you get it? We _can't_, Link. You're the _hero_. We have two different jobs meant for us, and there's no way they could overlap."

Link opened his mouth yet again, ready to protest. But this time, he was caught off guard. Suddenly, there was a pain in Pipit's voice that was almost tangible. That pain found a way to seep into his face, and even into his posture. Link saw Pipit's whole body practically pulse with the torture of restraint. "Link, we _can't_! I'm sure you know the legend better than I do; it's your fate to take the role as the chosen hero! It's your fate to save Zelda and restore peace! I... I am but a knight. I have no part in your legend. We can't disagree with the Goddess. As much as I wish we could... we can't break the destiny you were given. I..." Pipit rubbed at his eye with the palm of his hand in frustration, his brows knitting together. When he looked back at Link, there was a new kind of expression on his face. He looked determined, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't mask his sadness with it. "I'm more than satisfied to take a one-sided love with Karane if it means your safety. My happiness means nothing if your life, and the lives of others are put into jeopardy. Please, Link... Don't you understand?"

After a moment, and with much regret, Link pressed his lips together and nodded. Quietly, he said, "After I save her?"

Pipit thought for a bit before nodding. "Perhaps. Things could always change. We'll just have to see when that happens."

They stood there together in the cool night, thinking about all that had happened and everything that had been said. The lack of words tormenting and relieving at the same time. Link eventually spoke, his voice hardly audible. "Pipit...?" the freckled boy looked up without a word. Link continued, "Just... once more? Please...?" He understood, and couldn't keep himself from obliging just once more. His hand moved to gently cup Link's cheek, his left moving to Link's shoulder. The golden haired hero's hands rose to rest on the other boy's chest as they kissed again. They stood there for a moment that was far too short, appreciating the way the other felt under their fingertips.

Nothing more was exchanged, save for a couple of sad smiles that said absolutely everything. The two turned and went separate ways into the night.

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><p><strong>AN: **Writing the first half of this, the part from the game, made me realize how much '...'s were used and how much the characters stammer, at least in this scene... It eventually got distracting for me, haha. Personally, I wish I could have made it less dramatic, but I eventually gave up trying to make it less so. I also couldn't decide whether I was being too wordy, or moving too fast, or both. Either way, my biggest hope is that you liked it! Please shoot me a message or a review telling me what you would change, keep, typos I may have made, general thoughts... whatever! The greatest gift you can give me is constructive criticism.

Edit: Typos and diction. Broke up blocks of text for readability. Thank you, semifully!

Thank you for taking a look, and happy reading!


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